Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize