Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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