sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
