Kiss
Puke
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
