he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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