Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
