I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
