I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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