We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
