3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
