Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
