nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
