question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
stop calling my apartment porn island.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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