Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
