As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
