oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
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