Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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