My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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