i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
