This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I wish there were birth control emojis
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
