i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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