hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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