shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
