Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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