I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
