Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
