I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
