i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
