why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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