you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
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