Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Can I color on your dick again?
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
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