Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
