talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
