I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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