Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize