this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
she told me i tasted like america
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
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