Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
