we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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