"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
