Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
