I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
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