Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize