You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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