i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize