At least make sure they are 18
Why
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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