He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
