I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
No...this little piggys going to the bar
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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