i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
