Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Randomize
