I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
You had me at "let me see your balls"
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
