But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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